Hey guys, it’s Penny here. For this week’s post, I decided to talk about something I have been trying to do for a while and seeing its benefits.
The ‘healing your inner child ‘concept has become so popular lately as many people started gaining awareness about themselves, and this led many, including me, to heal some emotional issues that arose during childhood. Not many of us were blessed with welcoming home environments or parents, and as a result, we experience many difficulties in specific aspects of our lives, such as relationships, finances, or friendships. However, rewiring the brain is possible, and we can achieve the sense of equilibrium we never had during our childhood by reparenting ourselves.
What is reparenting?
Reparenting is a psychological concept that involves giving yourself the care, love, and support that you may not have received during your childhood. It recognizes that our early experiences and relationships shape our beliefs about ourselves and the world. Reparenting is about taking on the role of a nurturing and supportive parent for yourself.
How Can We Reparent Ourselves?
There are some key elements you can use while healing your inner child. The first step for me is to show yourself the compassion you have never received from your caretakers. You can start by treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer to a friend facing difficulties.
Setting Boundaries: People-pleasers are often the children whose boundaries are crossed. And now, as adults, they are the ones who have a hard time saying ‘no’ to things that they do not want to do or people they don’t want to see. Learning to establish healthy boundaries in relationships and respecting your own needs and limitations is one of the key steps in setting boundaries.
Inner Child Work: Exploring and understanding the wounded or neglected aspects of your inner child and providing the love and attention they may have missed. This is part of doing the inner work.
Forming secure relationships. This one was discussed by my professor in the Theories of Personality class I took during my bachelors. While she was talking about attachment theories and styles, she mentioned that the attachment model we developed during our childhood can change in adulthood if we form secure relationships. For instance, if you have an anxious attachment style with one of your parents, this can result in you feeling on edge and having intrusive thoughts about your partner or the relationship. However, this anxious attachment style can be fixed if you have a secure partner who is able to meet your specific needs.
Practicing self-care. Prioritizing activities and habits that contribute to your physical, emotional, and mental well-being will be beneficial while you are practicing self-care.
Mindfulness: Practicing mindfulness to become aware of your thoughts and emotions without judgment.Meditation can help you stay grounded and focused on the present moment.
Reparenting is a gradual process, and it's important to be patient with yourself. By consciously taking on the role of a supportive and nurturing parent, you can work towards healing past wounds and fostering a healthier relationship with yourself.However, the reparenting process can be a hard and tricky one if you have strained relationships with your caretakers. It’s important that you get professional help if it gets difficult to cope with arising emotions and thoughts. Therapy can provide a safe space for self-exploration and healing.
I hope you find it helpful. Let me know if you have ever done something about this before!
Until the next post,
x Penny
This is really good actionable advice. Being nurturing and supportive to yourself as a parent would to a child is how everyone should treat themselves. This will lead to higher self esteem and healthier thoughts.